Doc Sarge's Funkademy of Antagonistics

The weirdest video game conversation I've ever had

Thu, 23 May 2013 10:58:15 -0700

Me: glhf
Other guy: glhf
Me: I'm eating a chocolate banana milkshake
Me: so in a way
Me: I've already won.
Other guy: stfu fucking noob

The Wreck of the Joanna Ng

Thu, 23 May 2013 10:26:00 -0700

The Wreck of the Joanna Ng:

Billions of miles from the nearest habitable planet, the freighter ship Joanna Ng has been crippled. What fate will befall the crew? Nothing good. Honestly they’re pretty much all fucked.

I write fiction now. I’m a fictioner! Feedback welcome because I have no idea what the hell I’m doing.

Why the Scooby-Doo Mystery Team Is Terrible At Mysteries

Wed, 22 May 2013 10:30:00 -0700

Why the Scooby-Doo Mystery Team Is Terrible At Mysteries:

If you liked this YouTube-exclusive video, go to our channel to watch \

My Sketch is live on the front page of Cracked now! Watch it again!

5 Brilliant Clues Hidden in the Background of Movies

Tue, 21 May 2013 08:55:01 -0700

5 Brilliant Clues Hidden in the Background of Movies:

Sometimes movies gives away their own ending (or at least crucial upcoming plot points) by dropping vague little hints early on. You just have to keep your eyes open.

New article up! About foreshadowing in movies! I really like movies!

cracked: Next old guy with dementia better think twice before...

Mon, 20 May 2013 16:50:34 -0700

cracked:

Next old guy with dementia better think twice before stumbling around THIS abandoned carnival.

Why the Scooby-Doo Mystery Team Is Terrible At Mysteries

Subscribe to Cracked’s YouTube channel for exclusive YouTube Comedy Week hilarity.

http://www.youtube.com/cracked?sub_confirmation=1

Guys I wrote this sketch and then the people at Cracked filmed it with actors and then someone made gifs of it. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.

If you’ve ever wondered how absolutely rock-fuck-stupid the internet is, check out comics...

Sun, 19 May 2013 22:14:00 -0700

If you’ve ever wondered how absolutely rock-fuck-stupid the internet is, check out comics writer Gail Simone’s Tumblr to see people who don’t understand why a professional writer doesn’t like it when people torrent (steal) her work.

8 New TV Shows That Are Really Just 4 New TV Shows | Film School Rejects

Sun, 19 May 2013 18:22:11 -0700

8 New TV Shows That Are Really Just 4 New TV Shows | Film School Rejects:

Fox and NBC have announced their fall lineup, and it’s hard not to notice some similarities between their offerings. Even beyond the standard “here’s

5 Horrifying Implications of the 'Star Trek' Universe

Fri, 17 May 2013 09:15:43 -0700

5 Horrifying Implications of the 'Star Trek' Universe:

It turns out there are some horrible implications behind all that awesome technology and progressive ideology that are never addressed.

I can probably write off my Netflix Account, right? After writing this? Oh man I totally can.

The X-Men Rogue is the wet dream that Men’s Rights Activists won’t admit they’re...

Thu, 16 May 2013 14:48:18 -0700

The X-Men Rogue is the wet dream that Men’s Rights Activists won’t admit they’re having.

My Interview over at Geeky Universe

Thu, 16 May 2013 09:06:13 -0700

My Interview over at Geeky Universe:

The editors of Geeky Universe interviewed me about my last Cracked article, comic books and, for some reason, Avenue Q.

I really enjoyed your article about nerd racism (even if most people in the comments seem to disagree).

Tue, 14 May 2013 09:43:50 -0700

What’s this about a comment section?

19 Iconic Cultural Firsts From Human History

Sat, 11 May 2013 14:08:20 -0700

19 Iconic Cultural Firsts From Human History:

Right now, you are surrounded by really cool stuff. There’s probably a Doctor Who poster next to you, or a T-Shirt displaying some sweet band that you want people to associate with you. But where does this stuff come from? No one knows! Oh, wait, yes we do…

Remember when I asked you guys to ask me questions? I found the answers! I found all the answers!

This was fun. I’ll do it again, if you ask me a question again: What weird “first” from cultural history do you wanna know about?

The 5 Most Insulting Defenses of Nerd Racism

Sat, 11 May 2013 11:54:32 -0700

The 5 Most Insulting Defenses of Nerd Racism:

Warning, do not read around anything both extremely valuable and breakable.

I write articles about racisms for Cracked sometimes! This is one of those times!

thelastgleekbender: With all the memes and jokes about Charles...

Thu, 09 May 2013 06:01:56 -0700

thelastgleekbender:

With all the memes and jokes about Charles Ramsey, I decided to make this…

But seriously though. why is it that we as a generation will sooner make a joke about someone than actually acknowledge their significance, what they’ve been through or the good they have done? Its so sad how tasteless and insensitive we have become

also why does it always seem like it becomes most famous when its a black person thats the butt of the joke? Just something to think about

Not everyone agrees about Iron Man 3 — some people loved it, and other people are fucking...

Tue, 07 May 2013 17:11:20 -0700

Not everyone agrees about Iron Man 3 — some people loved it, and other people are fucking stupid.

But I think that everyone agrees that it didn’t have a sex-tape subplot.

And if it did have a sex-tape subplot? Well. I guess we’ll never know.

Crowd Sourcing: You guys come up with a question, and I'll do the research for you!

Fri, 03 May 2013 10:56:55 -0700

First performance of the Moon Walk? First guitar smashed on stage? First superhero? First movie sex scene? What Iconic cultural firsts do you WISH you knew about?

A Really Cool Observation About The Avengers and Shakespeare

Fri, 03 May 2013 09:42:39 -0700

A writer by the name of Dan Forward left a comment on my 5 Marvel Movie Characters Who Totally Dropped the Ball article that I think is goddamn brilliant and, with his permission, I’m reposting it here:

On the Loki thing, I completely agree with you. He was maybe the least compelling part of The Avengers, though I think that the movie wasn’t really about the villains, but just about the heroes coming together. However, there is at least one Shakespearean precedent for Loki’s dwindling abilities: Richard III spends the first three or so acts of his play convincing everyone to do everything he wants, to the point where it’s almost unbelievable. He’s so cunning you almost root for him, just like a lot of people did with Loki, I imagine. However, once Richard actually gets into power, once his plan works (and Loki’s plan did work up until the Avengers just out-muscled the Chitauri, right?), he loses his ability to convince or trick anyone, and everything falls to pieces, and he eventually dies. Loki’s fall follows a very similar trajectory. Both Loki and Richard III had to come out of the shadows at some point, and when they did, they found that they just couldn’t contend in an all-out fight with the Hulk. (I haven’t read Richard III in a few years, but I believe that the Hulk showed up in Act 5.)

I think that’s amazing, and though I haven’t read Richard III in a long ass time it certainly seems like a valid observation to me.

5 Marvel Characters Who Totally Dropped the Ball

Fri, 03 May 2013 09:12:38 -0700

5 Marvel Characters Who Totally Dropped the Ball:

Sometimes the characters in these movies seem to know less about what they’re doing than we do, and for every sensible decision they make, they stumble through a series of catastrophically terrible blunders that defy explanation.

I’ve wanted to write an entry in the unofficial “Totally Dropped the Ball” series for a long time, and I’m super glad I got to do it with some of my favorite contemporary movies.

Also, who else saw Iron Man 3 last night? What was your favorite part? What should they have done differently? Let’s all talk about it here or on my Facebook page!

Guys I Just Got Google Glass

Thu, 02 May 2013 09:07:22 -0700

My favorite feature is the Achievement App. Here are some screencaps I took with my brain:

6 Movie Good Guys You Didn't Notice Were Total Hypocrites

Wed, 01 May 2013 07:25:48 -0700

6 Movie Good Guys You Didn't Notice Were Total Hypocrites:

Heroic movie characters stand up for what they feel is right, and they stick to those beliefs until it’s inconvenient not to.

Guys I wrote this.