In the old days, the title character would have been the man.
5 Words That Used to Mean the Exact Opposite
#5. A “Harlot” Used to Be a Goofy Guy
Six hundred years ago, while Geoffrey Chaucer was banging out The Canterbury Tales in the middle of a gambling binge, he used the world “harlot” not to describe the type of lady who enjoys dancing to Def Leppard, but a goofy, somewhat mischievious man, because that’s what it meant. … Turns out we have no one to thank more for our ever-increasing library of synonyms for “slut” than the Bible. In the 15th century, “Harlot” was used to refer to people in the entertainment business, but when the Geneva Bible was published in 1560, the translators had used the word “harlot” in places where the previous Bibles had used “strumpet” or “whore,” because the difference between “actor,” “prostitute,” and “slut” wasn’t very important in that context.
I wrote this! It’s words about words.
"A Sterilization and Reassignment Team has been dispatched to your location."
"Please remain calm."
"Your Safety and Comfort is Our Priority."
(Source: justtheladyinblack, via the-pietriarchy)
I took a “What Breaking Bad Character Are You?” quiz and got “The Feelings of Inadequate Masculinity That Drove Walter to Crime” so that was sorta more insightful and unsettling than I expected.
OPEN GOOGLE DOC. EDIT ME. -
I haven’t thought this through at all but here’s an open google doc. Write whatever you want in it. I’ll publish it on Friday as long as it’s not racist or boring or something.
That’s all. Reblog this if you want, or add to it, whatever. I’m gonna go make mac cheese.
[Sarge on Tumblr]
Now imagine if that feeling came from parasites.
6 Horrific Realities of Living With a Bedbug Infestation
#6. You Will Cover Yourself in Vaseline
Getting bedbugs is like being a fan of the Chicago Cubs: Even though you know the days ahead are going to be filled with suffering and misery, you still have to get up every day and live your life. For instance, I had an active nightlife (that is, I did frequent late-night World of Warcraft raids), and bedbugs love their midnight munchies. So any time I looked down, I’d see a platoon of bloodsuckers sprinting across my desk. And I don’t much like being bitten — the distraction was seriously hurting my damage per second. So, I slathered my ankles, wrists, and arms with coating after coating of Vaseline until I resembled a glazed doughnut. And yes, it worked — the bugs would crawl up to me, try to feast on my delicious blood, and immediately get stuck. At the end of the night, I’d retire to the bathroom to scrape off the glaze — which was by now covered in bedbug sprinkles. I was the doughnut Satan would give as ironic punishment to a glutton.
I conducted the interview. Lily lived the life.
Together, we made sure the story was told.
Throughout your day, you’re going to come across women getting screwed over in varying degrees. On one end of the spectrum, there’s the passive-aggressive way that announcers insist on calling female olympic athletes “girls,” even though “Atomic Wonder Women” still feels like it falls short. And on the other end, there’s the spit-spattering rage directed at a Duke University freshman who’s paying her tuition by starring in porn — even though the only other way you can raise $60,000 in a year without missing class involves an island fortress and a crystal space laser (seriously, we ran the numbers).
But it turns out that this weird hatred isn’t just another bad idea we cling to for no reason. No, as this Cracked Classic shows, it’s a problem that’s built into the very fabric of our consciousness, like a “Three Laws of Robotics” of dumbfuckery.
5 Ways Modern Men Are Trained to Hate Women
Did you know that when we run a Cracked Classic, I’m the one who writes the revised intros? It’s true!
[Brockway on Tumblr]