Doc Sarge's Funkademy of Antagonistics

Aug 30

So what I got from the VMAs is that it’s fine for women to dance in a sexual suggestive manner and dress “slutty” as long as they’re doing it in support of another man. If they assume their own sexual agency, that’s weird and we all get uncomfortable.
My friend and fellow writer Kathy Benjamin wrote a great bit about how this was a calculated marketing scheme by a guy named Larry Rudolph, but my point exists along side that, I think. The fact that this was all orchestrated by a man is important in a “let’s analyze how the music industry works” sense, but not in a “let’s analyze how the average Jill and Joe perceived this” sense. Most people were made uncomfortable by Miley’s performance, but they couldn’t say why. It’s because she was displaying sexual agency. If she’d acted really submissive to everyone on stage, I don’t think it’d be getting half the attention it’s getting.
You comfortable with that?
The racist shit, however, was really really fucked up.

So what I got from the VMAs is that it’s fine for women to dance in a sexual suggestive manner and dress “slutty” as long as they’re doing it in support of another man. If they assume their own sexual agency, that’s weird and we all get uncomfortable.

My friend and fellow writer Kathy Benjamin wrote a great bit about how this was a calculated marketing scheme by a guy named Larry Rudolph, but my point exists along side that, I think. The fact that this was all orchestrated by a man is important in a “let’s analyze how the music industry works” sense, but not in a “let’s analyze how the average Jill and Joe perceived this” sense. Most people were made uncomfortable by Miley’s performance, but they couldn’t say why. It’s because she was displaying sexual agency. If she’d acted really submissive to everyone on stage, I don’t think it’d be getting half the attention it’s getting.

You comfortable with that?

The racist shit, however, was really really fucked up.

The Wreck of the Joanna Ng, Chapter 5 -

“But Joanna doesn’t speak like you and I, Connor. Not with words. No. She speaks with colors. All the colors. But primarily the colors of history. The most vibrant and beautiful and throbbing and majestic colors of all, Connor. The colors that define our experience as men. As men, goddammit!”

Arthur Something looked at Connor expectantly, like he needed a response.

“Yeah, dude,” Connor said.

See? Shit’s wack as fuck.

Aug 28

What a great movie, right?

What a great movie, right?

I see why this kind of thing is so popular — it’s way easier than being creative.

I see why this kind of thing is so popular — it’s way easier than being creative.

Aug 26

Then I realized that if you google “it’s the only way to be sure” you get Hicks macros. Hicks is awesome but he was repeating Ripley when he said that. You fucking philistines.

Then I realized that if you google “it’s the only way to be sure” you get Hicks macros. Hicks is awesome but he was repeating Ripley when he said that. You fucking philistines.

I just realized a macro for this quote didn’t exist. So made it happen.

I just realized a macro for this quote didn’t exist. So made it happen.

Aug 24

4 Awesomely Geeky Things Dads Built For Their Kids

#3: Dad and Son Build a Fully Functional Arcade in Their Basement
What probably started with a father trying to convince his son that the games of the ’80s were much radder than today’s resulted in a five-year project to build a fully functional arcade in their basement. Now it’s finished, and the thing is so realistic that we’ve spontaneously grown a mullet just looking at it.

4 Awesomely Geeky Things Dads Built For Their Kids

#3: Dad and Son Build a Fully Functional Arcade in Their Basement

What probably started with a father trying to convince his son that the games of the ’80s were much radder than today’s resulted in a five-year project to build a fully functional arcade in their basement. Now it’s finished, and the thing is so realistic that we’ve spontaneously grown a mullet just looking at it.

Aug 19

Turns Out Being Nice To People Sometimes Works

I’m really glad this happened today:

Honestly, my first instinct when I saw “MC Rapezilla” showing up in my Twitter Notification feed a while back was to just block him. My second instinct was to publicly shame him. I had some nasty jokes cooked up too.

But instead the angels of my better nature beat the angels of my dickhead nature in the ceremonial drinking contest, so I decided to play nice on the internet, and it turned out pretty alright. 

Aug 17

Google. …Go ogle? Huh.

Aug 15

The Wreck of the Joanna Ng -- Chapter 4 -

Connor considered the possibility of floating away, out into space. He’d probably be spinning as he went. As he tumbled the Joanna would slide in and out of view, getting smaller and smaller with each appearance. He wondered if he’d asphyxiate before she disappeared. He wondered how alone he’d be when he died.

Chapter 4 is up! Please read it!